1D Big Bang Mix - Getting Good at This fic by [livejournal.com profile] pukecrypukecry

Jan. 30th, 2014 09:15 am
katienyc: (1D - Louis is the prettiest)
[personal profile] katienyc

1. Sub Focus - Tidal Wave
I'm tired of being / On the outside
I wanna know / What it's like
I'm tired of seeing / All the sights
I wanna feel / Us collide

2. Matrix and Futurebound - Control
I don't want to lose control / But the minute I feel you next to me your fire takes hold
Falling like a burning stone / But it feels like you're my gravity
I'm gonna let myself go
Falling into you there's nothing I can do / I got no defense against you
Falling into you the ways you pull me through / I keep falling deeper into you

3. SWV - Weak
I don't know what it is that you've done to me / but it's caused me to act in such a crazy way.
Whatever it is that you do when you do what you're doing / it's a feeling that I want to stay.

4. Disclosure ft. Sam Smith - Latch
I’m so encaptured, got me wrapped up in your touch
Feel so enamored, hold me tight within your clutch
How do you do it, you got me losing every breath
What did you give me to make my heart beat out my chest

5. Britney Spears - Breathe on Me
Oh, it's so hot, and I need some air / And boy, don't stop 'cause I'm halfway there
It's not complicated, we're just syncopated / We can read each other's minds.
One love united / Two bodies synchronising
Don't even need to touch me

6. Duran Duran - Come Undone
Can't ever keep from falling apart at the seams
Can I believe you're taking my heart to pieces

7. Artful Dodger ft. Nicole - twentyfourseven
In the morning, in the evening / In the winter spring or summer
Whether it's early or it's late / It doesn't matter any time
Tender loving sweet devotion / Every second minute hour
I'll be waiting for you / Come put your lovin' on the line
Take me in your arms and let me know / That it's all right
Look into my eyes and let me see you / Deep inside
24 hours a day, seven days a week
I need to feel you here beside me
I need to hold and squeeze you tight

8. Fleetwood Mac - Everywhere
Something's happening / Happening to me
My friends say I'm acting peculiarly
C'mon baby / We better make a start
You better make it soon / Before you break my heart
Oh I...I want to be with you everywhere
Oh I...I want to be with you everywhere
Can you hear me calling / Out your name
You know that I'm falling / And I don't know what to say

9. Roger Sanchez - Another Chance
If I had another chance tonight
I'd try to tell you that the things we had were right

10. Calvin Harris ft. Ellie Goulding - I Need Your Love
Now I'm dreaming, will ever find you now / I walk in circles but I'll never figure out
What I mean to you, do I belong / I try to fight this but I know I'm not that strong
And I feel so helpless here / Watch my eyes are filled with fear
Tell me do you feel the same / Hold me in your arms again
I need your love / I need your time
When everything's wrong / You make it right

11. Rihanna - Stay
Not really sure how to feel about it / Something in the way you move
Makes me feel like I can't live without you / It takes me all the way
I want you to stay.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, the reason I hold on
Ooh, ooh, ooh, 'cause I need this hole gone

12. Pulp - TV Movie
Without you my life has become a hangover without end
A movie made for TV: bad dialogue, bad acting, no interest
Too long with no story & no sex
Is it a kind of weakness to miss someone so much?
To wish the day would go away?
Like you did yesterday
Just like you did yesterday

13. HAIM - Forever
I'm tired of fighting the good fight / If you say the word then I'll say goodbye
Forever I see you and me / Forever I'll try for you and I
No I never believed in their insight / Just another good reason to get it right

14. Gorgon City ft. MNEK - Ready for Your Love
I'm ready for my hands to touch the sky / I wanna understand how it feels to fly
I'm ready for my eyes to see the light / But most of all... Most of all
I'm ready to be strong, conquer my fears / I'm ready to be wrong so I can be right there
I'm ready to belong n shake my cares
But most of all..most of all
I'm ready for your love

15. Katy B - What Love is Made Of
Something about your smile / That keeps me close
Keeps me warm / Is what love is made of
Something about your eyes / That bright blue shine
I see your soul / Is what love is made of

16. Beyonce - Crazy in Love
It's the way that you know what i thought i knew
It's the beat that my heart skips when i'm with you
Yeah, but i still don't understand
Just how your love can do what no one else can

17. Clean Bandit - Rather Be
If you gave me a chance I would take it
It's a shot in the dark but I'll make it
Know with all of your heart, you can't shame me
When I am with you, there's no place I rather be
N-n-n-no, no, no, no place I rather be

18. Duke Dumont ft. A.M.E. - Need U (100%)
I wanna be the one you call, every day and night / Are you gonna be the one who's always gonna treat me right
And when we get together turning down the lights / Need you 100, need you 100%
I wanna be the one you tell all your friends about / Baby I'll be the one you just can't do without
You gotta give me everything, baby ain't no doubt / Give me 100, need you 100%
Fic excerpts that correspond to each song:
1. It’d be nice, is all, if he had someone who wanted to settle in somewhere with him. He suspects it’d be quite nice, anyway. So far, he’s never really had the opportunity to find out.

2. “Jesus,” Nick says, only pulling an inch away from Louis’ face. He’s gone a bit splotchy across his cheeks, and his hair is sticking up madly from Louis’ hand pulling at it. He tastes like mint and tea and something warm, and Louis desperately wants to kiss him again. And maybe get a hand on his cock. Maybe both at the same time.
“Shut up, c’mon,” he says, pulling Nick back in, because if he’s talking that means he’s not kissing Louisanymore, and he thinks that simply can’t stand. He arches against the couch so his hips come up a bit, and then fits his hands around Nick’s narrow waist to keep him from going anywhere.

3. It’s nice, he realizes, just being with Nick in general. As an experiment, he tries to find it in himself to regret coming over like he probably ought to, now that this has happened, because by all accounts, getting off with Nick Grimshaw is almost definitely a mistake. It probably should make him want to run, go home and call this whole thing off as a failure in the area of rational behavior.
It doesn’t. It makes him want to curl in even closer against Nick’s shoulder, and stay there.

4. Louis isn’t sure what to do with that, only knows that it makes his heart seize up in a new and paralyzing way, but -- but not in a bad way. Not at all. That might be as far as he can sort it out in any sort of meaningful way -- it’s not a bad thing -- but he can work with that. He can work with any of it.

5. It’s so hot it nearly stings, and Louis lets out a happy sigh, because this is -- it’s lovely. He won’t say it out loud, not to Nick or to anyone else, but it truly is. Nick is crowded in close to him, a hand fitted against the hinge of Louis’ hip as the water comes down on them, and the room is dark and smells like ginger and satsuma and something very much Nick. It’s hot and humid and just a bit claustrophobic, everything nearly overwhelmingly sensory, almost palpable in his lungs, and Louis thinks he may never leave this place, not ever.

“Hi, love,” Nick says. “Can I fuck you, d’you think?”
Louis is sure that whatever comes out of his mouth in response is just a noise, not any sort of intelligible word, but either way Nick seems to understand, smiling -- not even smirking, just smiling -- as he goes to rummage around in his bedside table while Louis scoots up the bed, propping a cushion underneath his hips before flopping backwards.

7. All he knows is that he would like to stay -- he’d like Nick to make him dinner, and he’d like to stay after that, and he’d like for Nick to fuck him, and for the two of them to curl up in his bed together, sleep there all night, and wake up and feed Millie her breakfast.
That’s what he wants.
So he says “All right, yeah,” and stays.

8. And why wouldn’t he? Louis is the one who knows how to fix Millie’s bottle and how to trick her into a nap when she’s fussing while still making it seem like her idea, and anyway, he’s been a Nick’s nearly every night this week as it stands. Even Zayn’s noticed, pulling pointed looks at Louis when he turns up at his flat for clean clothes or a shower.

9. Instead, he waits for Nick to ring him to ask where he’s gone. And then keeps waiting when he doesn’t.

After nearly a week and no word from him, he gets the message.

10. What Louis doesn’t say -- and this is mostly because when he starts to, he feels a bit of vom coming up, and closes his mouth entirely to stop it chucking out all over their shoes, rather than any sense of self-preservation -- is that he doesn’t want to find any other blokes to shag. It’s an incredibly irritating thought, that the only person he wants seems not to want him anymore. That maybe he did once, a bit, in a weird way, but it’s clear that Nick’s throwing him off, now, done with whatever diversion Louis was providing. It’s infuriating. Louis thinks maybe he will vom, just to register his displeasure with the whole situation.

Louis sighs, feeling sick and spinny and sorry for himself, and closes his eyes. Just as he thinks he won’t be able to stop from having sad and pathetic thoughts of Nick and MIllie any longer -- what they’re doing, and if they’re snuggled together on the sofa with Puppy right now, and if Millie ate today or if she fought her bottle like she’d done a few times recently, and what’s so wrong with Louis that they don’t bloody want him around -- he falls blessedly asleep.

He knows it’s a lie, of course, but it still sends a pang through him -- thinking about all the things Millie might be doing now that she wasn’t a fortnight ago that he’s missing. He can almost imagine it, absurd as it is, Millie and Nick sat around the kitchen table having a chat and a cuppa without him. Maybe that’s stupid, though. Millie’s sweet, but she’s not his. Maybe he hasn’t got any right to those things, to Millie’s first words and first steps and first days of school, much as he thinks he ought to. Nick’s her dad, now, he’s the one raising her. Louis is just a bloke he shagged for a bit.
The thought makes him so sad his stomach aches a bit.

13. “Just -- I dunno, call Harry if you want company or something,” Louis says, struggling to keep his voice quiet and even. It’s not fair of Nick to mess him about like this -- because he does want to stay, desperately, wants to curl up on the sofa with Nick and make sure Millie’s all right and that Nick is as well, and if all Nick wants is anybody with a pulse to keep him from feeling alone, then -- then it’s shit to make Louis so tempted to stay, when it might as well be anyone at all.

14. He knows he’s babbling, and he can’t stop it, now that he’s in the thick of it. “But I also missed you, you prat, God knows why. But I missed you, and your stupid hair, and Millie and the both of you together, and I was in cab here in less than a minute when you told me she was sick. So if you think I’m not like, invested in the both of you, or something, well -- you’re even thicker than I thought.”
He crosses his arms, hoping it makes him look firm and sure rather than about to be sick on his shoes, which is how he feels at the moment. It’s just -- it’s a lot, to put out there like that, when Nick is obviously trying to give Louis the opportunity to disentangle himself from them both without any fuss.

15. “Well, I do,” Louis says, trying to sound haughty. His heart is near to jumping out of his chest, though, so it’s hard to quite get there. “I’ve always known exactly what a prat you are, Nick, and I still, like -- all of that stuff. Y’know.”

This is what it’s like, Louis realizes, trailing his hands underneath the hem of Nick’s shirt and up his sides. Nick hums happily into his mouth and presses closer. This it what love is like. It must be -- it’s the biggest thing he’s ever felt, too large for his chest by miles, and it makes him want to laugh and grab Nick around the middle and hold him as tight as he can and shout all at once.
It’s ridiculous, he thinks. He feels like an idiot, grinning into the collar of Nick’s shirt, and Nick is grinning at him like an idiot as well, all soft and meaningful and no hidden jabs or prickly edges, just smiling, like he’s happiest just by having Louis here with him.
It feels ridiculous, but Louis is smiling as well, can’t force himself to stop, so he figures it must be okay.

17. Louis suddenly doesn’t know what to do with everything he feels lighting up inside of him. These two are his, he realizes, startling at how pleased it makes him to think. They both want him here, maybe even need him, and there’s nowhere else he’d rather be than trapped in a bed between these two for the rest of the day, snotty and insufferable though they can be, respectively.
This is precisely where he wants to be.

18. A moment later, he trips on the toy truck she’d left in the middle of the floor, and as he’s near to braining himself to death on the edge of the table, he thinks it’s a good job he loves both Millie and Nick so much, or else their combined chaos would’ve caused him to lose his mind years ago.

My second mix for 1D Big Bang! I was super excited that I got to make a mix for [livejournal.com profile] pukecrypukecry's absolutely AMAZING fic, that you should all go read right now. Nick and Louis and a baby - I'm not sure what else you could ask for! I also did this in a soundtrack style, so corresponding fic excerpts are under the cut, along with the tracklisting.

Also, forever amused that I seem to have been heavily influenced by radio 1 when making this mix.

Credit for the excellent manip used in the cover for this mix goes to fuckyeahtomlinshaw.tumblr.com. Thanks for letting me use it! :)
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